Torture Chairs!

This week I'm taking a project management course. So, today I sat for eight hours in a dimly lit conference room, in an uncomfortable chair with the temperature at sub-zero! We got into statistics a bit during the chapter on cost and schedule. It was an interesting course, but it required a lot of concentration under extreme circumstances. Now I'm bushed!!

The chairs in class today reminded me of the ones I sat in at Johns Hopkins Hospital. Mom will probably laugh when reading this blog because I've joked about them a lot over the years. I fondly (?) refer to them as "torture chairs." We all spent many, many hours in those torture chairs at Hopkins!

I'm sure I could be successful designing and selling medical furniture and "accoutrements." I've gained first-hand experience in hospital waiting rooms, emergency rooms, patient rooms, etc. 18 years of it! What they have today could not have been designed from an "experience" perspective. So I think manufacturers should be required to spend time hanging out in hospitals. It would put a new spin on their designs.

Hospital furniture should not only provide comfort to the patient but to their primary caregiver and family as well. Especially during those long transplant surgeries of up to 19 hours! We sat through three of them! Can you imagine? I can remember our boys Kyle, Danny and Randy sprauled out on the waiting room floors...trying to catch a few hours of sleep in between the surgeon's updates.

The long banks of chairs in the waiting rooms all have arm rests in between each seat. What's that about? There is simply no way you can stretch out and get comfortable for long periods of time in those crazy chairs. After putting in grueling hours waiting, even the dirty floor was a welcome comfort for our boys. Also, there were times after sitting for hours in Ken's hospital room that I would climb right into bed next to him because I was so tired and weary. After days, and days on end, I could no longer bear to tolerate those rigid little chairs!

And here's one I know Mom will remember, "How about the custodians rolling those huge trash bins down the hospital corridor about 3 AM? " Surely those roller wheels could be made of something that would spin quietly. Remember that Mom?

Also, why didn't I think to make tally marks on the emergency room walls? I know if I had, they would now be covered with an interesting pattern from the hundreds of visits we made there. Some things...well...still conjure up difficult aspects of those years and years of Ken's illness. And that's only from our perspective. I don't even wish to think about how it was for Kenny...

A Kindred Spirit

The other day, I met a woman at work who lost her husband over a year ago. I had passed by her at work many times before, but had no idea that she was a widow too. It just shows you that you never know what someone is going through, you never really know what's behind that personae displayed for the outer world to see.

We talked for a few minutes and I shared my blog with her. The next day she sent me a very nice e-mail. As I read her touching message I was struck by how much her husband and their situation had been like Kenny's and mine. I now have a kindred spirit at work, who knows too well what I am feeling. These are the encouraging words of my newest widowed friend--

Thanks, I did enjoy the story. I remember when my Husband found out he had Huntington's, I thought why him? He is a people person, always putting other people's needs before his. He is a wonderful Husband and Father. An all around family man that was very close with everyone in his family. Parents, sisters, brothers, aunts uncles and cousins. Everyone liked Dale. He loved his job and was a dedicated soldier for 23 years, serving as the Assistant to the Sergeant Major of the Army, who is the highest ranking Enlisted Soldier in the Army. We did everything together and our children were our life. How could this happen?

Dale was always a very positive person and lived each day as if it was the most special to him. Instead of thinking about his illness we began to focus on how lucky we were to have found each other and to have had 40 wonderful years together. We knew that many people never find that kind of happiness. How wonderful our children were and how lucky we were to have them. To be able to show them the world.

The last two years Dale was not able to leave the house and I could see a change, he had lost that spark in his eyes, but he never gave up. I know he is much better off now and maybe the reason why so many good people die young is because they have a bigger reward waiting for them and it is their time to receive it. I loved this wonderful man for 40 years, he was my Husband, my Lover and my Best Friend.

He will always be a very special part of me and always in my heart, but he will not be back and I know he would want me to move on and enjoy life to the fullest. That is what I would have wanted for him, if the situation had been reversed. He still knows that I love him completely, but now it is time for a new chapter in my life and I must move on without him. I will treasure each day and live life to the fullest and one day, I know we will see each other again.