Tired, tired, tired

I had dinner tonight with a friend and watched a movie. But...I was so tired I kept falling asleep. I'm not very good company right now I'm afraid. I'm just way too tired. Work is kicking my behind. I was working on something today...all day...having formatting problems with it. Finally I had to get someone else to fix it for me this afternoon. She just sent me the file a few hours ago and now I'll be getting in the office bright and early to finish it up for a 9AM meeting. Hopefully I can get it all done. I will be playing beat the clock once again.

I've got other meetings tomrrow spread through out the day...the last one is at 3PM. The thought of a meeting so late in the day on a Friday makes me crazy. Last Friday I didn't get home until well after seven. I hope I don't repeat that tomorrow.

Right now, sitting on a beach somewhere with a good book sounds like a dream. That, or sleeping in on a Saturday morning...without Jazz patting me on the face to wake me up. That sounds good too. But...I don't think I will be enjoying either of those any time soon.

Today, I said goodbye to my friend Dennis. He is the guy who connected me with Hugh Cassidy, the metal sculptor. Dennis is retiring and moving to Mississippi. In the short time I've come to know him...well he is one awesome human being! The best of all kind. As it turns out, he had volunteered for years as a bereavement counselor with Hospice of the Chesapeake. That profession suits him very well. I'll bet he has been a great help to a lot of people.

And here's another interesting connection. I had called Hospice of the Chesapeake last year, the day before Kenny died. My friend Monica gave me the phone number of one of the volunteers. Although we had decided to keep Kenny in the hospital, I was at a loss for knowing what to do and how to handle the situation. You see hospitals are in the business of keeping people alive...and when it comes to the business of dying they are not nearly as well versed.

Under the circumstances, the woman from the hospice was a real blessing. She talked with me over the phone and gave me some advice that made a world of difference for handling Kenny's last days. For example, she told me that even the moments when Kenny appeared to be unconcious, he could still hear everything we were saying. And so, Lisa and I continued to talk with him. I told him stories about the things I would do to keep myself busy this year, like working in the yard and planting pretty flowers. I tried to think of anything I could to bring him some peace so he would know I was going to be OK.

I will be forever greatful to Hospice of the Chesapeake, the volunteer's advice and the comforting work they do. I've added their website to my list of favorites. I may even join their widows support group some time soon.

Now everything comes full circle. Dennis has shared my blog with his friends at the hospice and they may use it for their support groups. That would bring such purpose to my writings. I had set out to help others with my experiences...and I'm amazed at how events and connections weave people together.

In fact, consider how I got to know Hugh...through Dennis. It was only a few weeks ago that Dennis connected the two of us together. If the timing of my arrival for this assignment or Dennis's retirement had shifted by just two weeks, the connection would never have happened. A coincidence? Of course not! God is sure good and life is sweet! Dennis...safe journey my friend! Please keep in touch.

Can You Believe It?

I am at a loss for words. I know... That never happens!! How can it be?! Who knows, but even I, sometimes have few words to say. Right now I'm just putzing around my house, tidying up a bit and thought I needed a little break.

Work was pretty busy today and mostly rewarding, with a few bumps along the way. We continue to work on a new strategic plan and are racing along to get it and all the details done in time to showcase it at our leadership Summit. It's a pretty daunting task, but it keeps me busy and off the streets!! Ha! Actually about now, I would enjoy some time on the streets of Washington. I've got some sightseeing I want to do. But clearly it'll have to wait until after August 18th!

I've got all kinds of plans for the birthday weekend. Will definitely go to my metal apprenticeship Saturday morning. I wouldn't miss it for the world. Later Saturday night I'm supposed to go to Dylan's house for a party. He is my friend Marti's oldest son. Marti and I have known each other since Jr. High School. It's Dylan's wife Elise's birthday weekend too and Marti's was yesterday. It will be a tri-birthday celebration.

Sunday my family plans to go to a local wine festival. It's over near Leesburg and there is supposed to be live music and everything. That should be a fun way to round out the weekend.

Jazz is over there now relaxing. He was very vocal this evening. Meow, meow, meow! Not sure what he was talking about. He has food, he has water...but he just seemed to be trying to tell me something. Maybe he wants to go home?

I've got news for Jazzy Boy! We are not going anytime soon!! I've still got too many people to see, too many things to do.

Kyle and Jessica's wedding plans are coming along nicely. I finally had a chance to send them some addresses last night. Jess is getting ready to send out the invitations. She is one VERY organized gal. She just keeps on checking things off for the big day.

Well I'm going to shut this thing down for now. Surprise...even with a loss of words...I still managed to find something to talk about. I know...you are really NOT surprised, are you? Have a good night!

Today Will be a Good Day

I am willing it to happen. The day will go perfectly. Work will click. I'll see some new old friends and something mysterious and wonderful will come to be. That's how I see this day. It's gonna be a good day!

I'm Whipped

Went to dinner tonight with my brother. Had a nice time. We walked to a place just down the street. $2 beers and good food. Perfect! I'm pretty tired though. Work is hectic...running through my days. Would sure like to take a break. Don't see that happening anytime soon until after this Summit August 18th. Gonna crash now...need to get some much-needed rest. Sleep tight!

A Year Has Now Passed...

I can't tell you the number of times I've cried to the song Landslide. I even started crying to this one before Kenny actually died. There is something called anticipatory grief...and yes, I experienced it...for over 18 years. This song still touches my heart...even today.

When Kenny and I met at 19, we loved Fleetwood Mac. Before we married we spent many evenings in his apartment listening to their beautiful music and lyrics. We loved their Bare Trees and Rumors albums. This song in particular, sung by Stevie Nicks, pretty much says it all.

A year has now passed since Kenny died and I find myself still wondering when this emptiness will leave me... Yet I know that I need to celebrate today, the life of this man who was so courageous, so kind, so funny and so adoring of me. I am blessed...so blessed...beyond my ability to describe it! Thank you Kenny.

Click on the arrow in the box below. If you can not see a music box, go to the internet and download Adobe Flash Player. Then you will be able to play Landslide, by Stevie Nicks. She dedicated this song to her father. And well, I'd like to do the same today. Love you Pop! Give Mom a kiss for me and be sure to hug her today and don't let go!

Fleetwood Mac - Landslide via Noolmusic.com

Rhonda is Coming!

Oh My Gosh! I just got off the phone with Rhonda and she will be here tomorrow night. She has a conference this week near the White House and she is joining Lisa, Priscilla and I for dinner! Oh My Gosh! I am so excited to not have to face this date alone. Not a coincidence...right? It will be one year tomorrow since Kenny died.

I spent the afternoon straightening my apartment, doing laundry, changing my sheets, doing dishes and hanging pictures. Expecting company is quite motivating!! I even hung my big "stuffed animal" lion's head on my living room wall.

It's a bizarre place...my little apartment. Now the lion stares at me when I'm paying my bills. Mr. Shrek is sitting in the living room too and I just bought some zebra print covers for my bistro chairs. And yesterday Carla gave me a cool brown and black zebra print rug. It's perfect for my bathroom. The colors blend nicely with the brown and blue towels and shower curtain I bought last weekend.

I suppose I'm getting a little ecentric in my old age. But, my apartment is funky and fun...just the way I like it! I finally got my box of photos from Priscilla and started setting them around too. I've got the one of Kenny with Chloe giving him goo-goo eyes. It's one of my favorites. It's on top of my fridge so I can see it from the kitchen and the living room and it makes me smile.

I got a very sweet voicemail today from new friend Leslie...she's a member of my "widows club." At least that's what we jokingly call it. It's a special society and not everyone can join...thankfully. For once it's a club that people are not standing in line to be admitted.

Leslie wished me a good day tomorrow and said she is proud of me. She knows too well how hard this is. She also told me to celebrate the day...not to make it mournful. I have to admit, she has a point. I am so blessed to have been married to a man who loved me with ALL of his heart! In fact, he absolutely adored me. How lucky is that?

Tomorrow night, Rhonda, Priscilla, Lisa and I will raise a toast to Kenny. We will also think about the niece of my highschool friend Mary. It will be the one year anniversary of her kidney and pancreas transplant. Can you believe she received the gift of life at Hopkins the same day the angels welcomed Kenny home? Ken would be pleased that we can celebrate her new life...a second chance at living. Just as Kenny was so blessed ...not just once, but three times.

A Beautiful Day!

I'm glad that I had my metal apprenticeship appointment to get me up and out of the apartment yesterday. I was on my way bright and early, listening to Crosby, Stills and Nash...and well that's when the somber mood lifted. The scenery was beautiful, the sky was blue, and the clouds billowing...soon I was happy again.

The class went well. I learned to hammer brass in concentic rings to make a bowl, I learned to use the chop saw to cut some thick metal, I used the acetyline torch...and learned this simple rule: On is: Acetyline first, oxygen last...Off is: oxygen first, acetlyne last. I'll have to drill that into my head until it sets there forever. With the torch, I heated up an iron rod and hammered it into a point. Next I hammered out all of the edges to make it round rather than square. This one I had to do over and over. I wasn't quite getting it. Soon I would lose the heat and have to heat it again. "Strike while the iron is hot!" But, it was much more difficutl than it appears, so Hugh would shape the iron back into a square again...and I would start over until I got it right. In the end, mine was not as good as Hugh's but with practice it will get there...I'm sure.

I did enjoy my fist burned hand but enjoy is not the right word to describe it! I grabbed a piece of metal not realizing it would still be hot. Fortunately my reflexes are fast, I dropped it immediately to the ground and plunged my hand in the bucket of water. I tried to shake it off, I was embarrassed and didn't want Hugh to feel bad...but as he talked about the next part of the lesson...man my hand was throbbing! I was sure it would be all blisterd. But...amazingly today I can barely see where it was burned. Once again, God is looking out for me.

After my lesson I showered at Monica's and she fixed me this awesome salad with fresh tomatos. It's always great to have time to spend with my darling friend Monica. She is one of the dearest people I know...and believe me, I know a lot of dear, dear people. I'm blessed.

Next I ran by Priscilla's and picked up my file box and a few other things she was keeping for me. Then had dinner with Kyle, Jessica and Chloe. I left there and headed to Carla's. Didi, Carla and I went to see our old High School friend Terry at the hospital. He is battling a rare form of leukemia. It's another of life's puzzling mysteries. He is a gentle, sweet, kind, God-fearing man...who has a life-threatening disease. I won't even bother to try to figure it out. We spent some time there visiting; it was the first time I had stepped foot in a hospital since Kenny died and the equipment was all too familiar.

I spent the night last night at Carla's. I was too tired to drive back to Virginia. Sorry Jazz! He will be mad at me when I get home.

Now I'm headed to church with Carla and Didi. Didi's daughter's boyfriend is giving the sermon today. He is studying to be a minister and I can't wait to meet him. I've heard so much about him.

Later I'll have lunch with Priscilla and finally drive back to my apartment. I still have laundry and bills to do. I also just got a message from my boss and have some more things he wants me to pull together for tomorrow's morning's meeting. Boy...I'm busy!!

God I Love Fred Astaire

A friend sent me the following dance clip. It's Fred Astaire and Eleanor Powell from 1940. It's amazing and it was filmed in ONE unedited camera shot. It takes me back to my teenage years when Mom and I would spend our Saturday afternoons watching old movies, like Mickey Rooney, Fred Astaire, Shirley Temple, and of course good ole' Tarzan.

We weren't totally killing the day. Often times we would get out the ironing board and iron a ton of clothes while we watched the movie. And here's how we did it. We had an old green 7-up bottle with an aluminum sprinkler head inserted in the neck. We filled that bottle with water and sprinkled each piece of clothing until it was just moist. Then we rolled them up tightly and put them in a big old plastic bag to so they wouldn't dry out until we got around to ironing them.

Those were the days! And heaven forbid we should REALLY relax on a Saturday and just watch a movie. In those days, relaxing was unheard of! But regardless, it sure was fun and seeing this old clip brought back some fond memories of days gone by. Of course, I would easily roll back the clock and do it all again. In a heart beat! Even the ironing part! Love you MOMMY!

A Change of Perspective

So ya know, maybe I'm not so happy after all. It kind of hit me now. I was standing on the subway platform this evening waiting for a train and had plenty of time to think. The train was late and as I waited, the crowd got thick with people wanting to get home. When it finally arrived everyone shoved in...no one was willing to wait any longer, including me.

I pushed myself and my computer bag into that train and stood there crammed in with a divese crowd of people. There was really no need to hold on, there was no place to fall, since we were so tightly packed together. Yet, even though there were people all around me, I was alone. That familiar feeling came over me once again...I am all alone. I imagined that most of the people on the train were hurrying home to someone...a spouse, a friend, a parent, a child. But not me...well except for my kitty cat. Thankfully I have Jazz. Not sure what I would do without him.

I can't explain why the loneliness hit me today. Maybe because I'm tired. It's been a difficult week and the pace will continue the next few days and weeks until our leadership summit mid August. Perhaps it was just that I finally stood still long enough to think and allowed the loneliness to creep in. And just maybe that's why I don't allow myself to stand still for very long. I typically run through each day cramming as much in as I possibly can. That way I won't have time to think.

But...now that I have...it's hard to believe Kenny has been gone for a few days shy of an entire year. That's twelve months...TWELVE months! 365 days! How can that be? It's really hard for me to fathom. And, I'm not sure I'm so happy after all. I was just trying to fool myself. It's going to take just a little bit longer. I guess that speaks to the shifting emotions of being a widow.

Could I Be More Tired?

"Finn" and I high-tailed it out of Baltimore as soon as we could break free after the meeting, and headed to Annapolis to Kenny's Mom's. I had to pick up my Jazzy B! We stopped on the way and had a cocktail...it was our reward for an exhausting, but successful two days! Then we made our way over to pick up the boy.

Kenny's Mom was excited to see us and unloaded her fridge on us two girls. We ate and talked and laughed about Jazz. She told us all about his antics while I was away and he seemed to be perfectly happy spending the two days at her house. Over dinner, Jazz was doing his best to grab our attention and kept coming up to me...and reaching out to touch me with his paw. Needless to say, he was happy I was back. After a little while we loaded up the car with all of Jazz's paraphenalia...including Jazz, tucked inside his shoulder-strapped carrier...and headed home. I needed to drop off Finn in DC on my way to Virginia and it was getting late.

It was raining pretty hard when we started our trip...which made it even more precarious to maneuver our way through the DC streets. My vision at night is not the best and add to that the slick, rainy streets and well...it was just not good. I dropped off my friend at her home, just off South Dakota Avenue, and made my way down Bladensburg Road, to 395 South. Luckily I found my way just fine and was home lickety split.

I had to make two trips from the parking garage upstairs to my little apartment. One was with Jazz and his litter box, the next was with my suitcase and computer. Boy it felt good to finally be inside and lock my apartment door. Jazz is happy to be home too!

Tomorrow I have a follow up meeting from the two-day offsite. Me and a few of the Execs are getting together at eight AM to continue working on the Strat Plan. I have to get in there pretty early to print a few documents for the meeting. Phew! I am so-o-o tired. I'm sure I will crash on Friday!

How Can I Be So Happy?

Tonight, after our meeting, a bunch of us walked over to Little Italy for dinner. On the way, as we road down the elevator, I caught a glimpse of the Hopkins dome in the distant skyline. All I could think is, "There it is." It's the place that for so long had been our home away from home...

Over the years Kenny and I had watched Hopkins build new hospital wings and add more and more buildings to the sprawling complex. We even watched a new parking garage go up...and years later be torn down. We saw so many changes there and in the surrounding neighborhoods. In fact, we watched as Camden Yards was built...and saw that entire area change as well. Eighteen years of driving in and out of this City...brought us an ever changing view of Baltimore.

And it feels odd to be so close to the one-year anniversary of Kenny's death...and yet feel happy. In fact, it makes me feel guilty in a way...like what is wrong with me? How can I possibly be so happy? But I am. And thankfully I know Ken would be relieved. I know he is rejoicing that I am finally doing better.

It's been a long, difficult year. The hardest one of my life. But things are looking up in a strange kind of way. That's not to say that Monday will NOT be difficult. Of course it will be, as it will for anyone who knew and loved my Kenny.

But, I am doing my best to stay on the upbeat about things. I know that's what Kenny would want. I can hear him saying, "Luce, it's OK, it's been so hard on you. I want you to be happy; you deserve to be happy." I know that's what Kenny would say.

What a View!

Here I am in Baltimore again! I hadn't been here since Kenny died and it felt a little weird driving into the City for something other than a trip to Hopkins. I arrived last evening, checked into my hotel room, threw open the draperies and...WOW! A view of the harbor...and on the Government rate! That never happens!! What a beautiful sight and...there it was...the old familiar Domino Sugars sign all lit up in neon. Love it!

On my way here, I dropped off Jazz at Kenny's Mom's house. This time, I put him in the carrier and didn't hear a peep from him. He settled right down and took a little nap as we drove through DC, then Maryland...on our way to Annapolis. We got there and he walked around a bit, but he sure remembered the place. He sprawled right out on the kitchen floor...made himself at home. That's good. Gives me one less thing to worry about.

At Ferne's we had dinner together and it was nice having something homemade for a change...chicken, macaroni salad and fresh tomatoes. Perfect. Then I headed here to Baltimore.

When I finally got to the hotel, I shoved my suitcase into the room and headed out to the harbor place. Still docked in the harbor was the U.S. Constitution. It's a big old civil war era sailing ship. I remember going on it as a little girl with my Parents and Grandparents. Not sure how old I was, but I think I was about four or five.

The shops at the harbor were buzzing with people. I walked around, bought a few things and just took in the sights and sound of it all. I spent some time just sitting on the dock, talking on the phone with my sister Lisa. I sure love being back here. I appreciate everything so much more since I've been gone. The Baltimore Harbor is awesome! What a spectacular place.

Here I am now getting ready for the big meeting. It's a strategic planning conference with our VPs. And I'm excited to be here...yes...I know...I'm a bit of a geek! But this stuff is right up my alley. Well...better get going. This should be a full day...

I Wore Myself Out!

Today was even more tiring than yesterday. First thing this morning, I sanded the bathroom vanity and polished it with gel gloss. It's made out of cultured marble and it had been all scratched and dingy from previous tenants here. It was bugging me; it just didn't look very nice. Now it's practically brand new! I did the same to the stainless steel kitchen sink, but used steel wool instead. Yesterday I had picked up some fine gauge steel wool at the hardware store. I buffed it with that, then polished it too. Now the water beads up and it doesn't get those nasty water marks and rings.

Later I drove to Old Town Alexandria...which is only about ten or fifteen minutes from my apartment. I puttzed around picking up a few more things to make this feel like home...a shower curtain, a basket to hold towels in my bathroom, a bedspread and blanket. I also found a cute greeen metal table to use in my living room for an end table. Slowly but surely things are coming together here.

I got home this evening and had to haul all the stuff up from the basement. I borrowed the cart from the front desk. Then I finished drying my sheets, made my bed and got the rest of the laundry done. I opened a box of kitchen stuff...finally. It had been in the back of my car since last week. I got everything out and washed that stuff too and put it all away. Now I'm tired...exhausted really, and can't believe I have to go to work tomorrow!! Not only that, but I still have to pack for the meeting in Baltimore. I will be driving there after work tomorrow...first I'll drop of Jazzy B at my mother-in-law's. It will be a busy day, and an even busier week for me. The project will really crank up into high gear the next several weeks!

I could use a few more hours to chill this evening, but I know I've got to go hit the sack so I can recuperate. I'm glad I got so much done today and it's good to be settling in. Jazz is happy that I'm here for a change. He is right next to me as usual. He follows me around like little a puppy-dog....er...a...sorry Jazz...I mean cat!!!

Too Tired to Blog...

Not too often am I too tired to blog...but today I really am! I spent three hours this morning, outside in the heat, learning all about metal sculpting with Hugh. What a dear of a man! His wife is too. Today for my first lesson, I leaned to use a number of tools and he had me practice cutting, chamferring, grinding and hammering different pieces of metal. I even took a stainless steel spoon, hammered it flat..then used a ballpien hammer to texturize the steel. In the end, I bent a nice curve back into the spoon. It never occured to me that you could take an ordinary stainless steel spoon and turn it into a piece of art!

After we had been out there for a few hours working in the heat of the day, Hugh's wife Barbara, carried out a tray with ice-cold drinks for us. She had stirred some mineral water into apple juice and it sure was refreshing on a hot steamy day!

The lesson ran a little over the three hours...mostly because Hugh kept remembering one more thing that he wanted to show me. I got to see his larger-than-life sculptures...all "found metal." He had welded them together into all sorts of things, mostly people, birds, and dragons. I also got to see some of his daughter Eva's originals. One painting I recognized from her web site.

Once I was headed home, I called Martine and she invited me out on her boat. So, I stopped at K-mart and bought a bathing suit, towel and sunglasses, then headed over to the Marina in Edgewater. I spent the rest of the day with Martine and Jeff tooling around on the South River. We ended up anchoring on one of the creeks and spent some time there swimming.

By early evening Taylor (their son) and Ashley joined us. I finally got to see Martine's little grandson Tristan. He is ten months old and is a real curly headed cutie. After we got off the boat we headed to La Fiesta, the local mexican restaurant and had dinner together. Tristan entertained us by doing all sorts of cute things...but especially by saying "Uh oh" then looking down as if to see what had dropped. Each time he did something cute, we would all bust out laughing. It was a perfect, but exhausting day!

I just got out of the shower...that was great after feeling sticky and gross all day. Phew! Tired! I'm turning in now...

Eva's Dad

Tomorrow morning I am going to meet Eva's father, Hugh Cassidy and I am humbled. Not only is he a talented muscian and accomplished artist...but he is Eva's father and I have been a fan of hers for so many years. She was taken from us in her thirties...a treasure gone way too soon. Meeting her father..well, very simply, how do such things happen?

Hugh will teach me welding and everything about "found metal" sculpture. I really can't believe I am so-o-o blessed. It would be an honor just to meet him, let alone have him share his talent with me! What can I say? Kenny can you believe it baby?

T.G.I.F.

It's been a long and exhausting week! Thank God it's Friday!!!

Two Touching Comments

Brad posted a comment today about Erin and his faith in God. You can find it at the bottom of Tuesday's post: My God. It pretty much sums up how I feel as well. And for anyone who doubts God's existence...well please refer to Brad's message. I believe it may prompt you to reconsider.

Also, see the comment I got on yesterday's post from another dear high school friend, Colleen. She went through a serious battle with cancer a few years ago. I am happy to say she is healthy today and is back at life again...full throttle. Most of the year she lives in Saudi Arabia. Now that's interesting. Oh, I'm sure the stories she could tell!

To Brad and Colleen...two treasures!! God Bless you both!! I am honored to know you and call you my friends!!

Rushing a Bit

Not sure where the time went this evening except that I didn't get home until about 6:30 PM That means I put in nearly a twelve hour day. I was in the office by 6:30 AM and hitting it hard. One of my assignments is kicking my butt. Nearly impossible deadlines, but I'm gonna keep on workin' it. Hope to "git er done!"

This evening I walked a block up the street and had dinner at Noodles. I ordered Pad Thai and sat out at the street-side table to eat. Love that! There is so much activity here that it is never lonely eating alone. I was too busy watching all the bikers, joggers, walkers. I even kept an eye on the chauffeur waiting outside McCormick and Schmick's restaurant. Seems funny to see a limo sitting out there. I wonder if it was some politician or something? Probably! But I didn't linger around to find out. I finished my meal and headed back home.

Jazz is running around the apartment. He probably slept all day and now has energy to burn. I got a message that they are coming to paint my balcony tomorrow. Not sure why; I didn't even notice it needed paint. But, I'll have to put Jazzy B in the bedroom and bathroom tomorrow before I leave. That's easy, I can close off both rooms to the rest of the apartment and they know I have a cat. They also know I would literally DIE if anything happens to my Jazzy Boy! No worries!!!

I got an email from my friend Jane tonight. She is the one who is taking care of my house down south. Everything is fine...the plants are all fine. She's doing well and is taking good care of everything. What a blessing!!

My God...

My God...is it OK to say My God? I got a another message from Brad, my dear high school friend and he sent me several photos of his family and his darling Erin. She died one year ago today. I couldn't help but cry. I'm not sure when I've seen such a beautiful girl and I'm guessing if she had her father's spirit...well, what a loss. What a tremendous loss. I find myself wondering how people get through such an experience. But I know that Brad...back all those years ago in high school...had a solid faith in God, even while I was still questioning God's existence. I'm guessing his faith is what has seen him through. He still misses his beautiful daughter. Of course! And now...I miss her too!

I can not wait to see this guy and meet his wife. I know I will want to steal away for hours and talk with them. We have so much of life to share.

I hope this photo of his beautiful Erin...reminds everyone to treat life as a precious gift, not to be wasted. Dear Lord, bless and comfort this grieving family today and always.

My Grandma Green

I just got off the phone with my Grandmother. She is 94 years old and lives in asissted living in Pennsylvania. She said she was not doing so well today. She fell this weekend, has a big knot on her head and sore ribs...likely they are broken. I had no idea.

I called because she had just simply popped into my mind and I decided I needed to talk with her. Ater telling me how she fell and all the circumstances she said, "Enough about me Cissy, how are you doing?" And I replied, "Well, to borrow your expression, Grandma, I am happy as a clam!"

Pretty soon she forgot all about her sore ribs and was lost in my update. I told her all about my little apartment and how I love it here. I told her how everything is compact and convenient. I said, "This morning I took my trash a few doors down and dropped it into a chute never to be seen again!! Now that's pretty cool!" I explained that when I get up in the morning, my bathroom is a few steps from my bedroom; the kitchen is right across from that. I could tell Grandma was pleased that everything is going so well. She said, "Cissy, don't you remember what I told you?" That everything would be looking up you some day?" I said, "Yep, just as you predicted things are going very well for me now Grandma."

As for my apartment, I pop on the radio first thing each morning, get my coffee going and jump in the shower. There's a place for everything...and everything is in its place!! I like this "minimalist" living. In fact, my sister insists that I get cable so I can watch T.V. but I'm not convinced. I'm not a TV-a-holic. And I've found that with my laptop and air card I can get news on streaming video, HGTV tips and just about anything else I want. I'm going to take my time before I decide about spending money on cable. Besides, without T.V. I will be prompted to keep in touch with people more...read more books and get more exercise. At least that's what I'm guessing! Who knows maybe I'll even begin to write some "old fashioned" letters once in a while. Now wouldn't that be a good thing?

My conversaton with my Grandmother ended by me saying, "Grandma, just take it easy, continue to rest until you are feeling better. " She replied, "Oh Cissy, no need to worry about me. I'm going to live another fifty years!" And you know? I think she's probably right!

More and More Life Travelers...

Over the weekend I got a message from another old high school friend. I had signed up on my alumni site a few months ago and steadily people have been contacting me. This guy Brad is someone I adored in High School. He is just a decent all around guy. And I haven't seen him since I graduated. But low and behold I popped open my e-mail and there was a message from this long lost friend. Sadly he explained that he lost his daughter Erin, last year in a boating accident. He said he and his wife have had a tough year too. That's what I mean by "life travelers." I keep meeting people who have been touched in some way by some tragic or challenging event. We all learn from these experiences and if we survive them, as strangely as it sounds, we are forever changed in a positive way. We are never the same...and will never take life for granted again. Brad said he is coming to the reunion in August and I can't wait to see him!! I've looked for him all these years...

Today work started a bit rocky. Just ordinary job stuff; computer problems, meeting issues... the typical work junk that makes ya feel a little funky. I worked on keeping it in perspective...and finally POOF! The clouds were chased away by the message I got from another old high school friend. This one from Mary, said she would always remember me for the year I helped her try out for Pom-poms. And now I recall working and working with her...correcting her every step, every day, until try-outs. Yes, she made it and was one of the best on the squad!!I can still see her marching perfectly tall, high stepping it, with her head held high. The cool thing is that after all these years she still remembers that I helped her...even though I had long forgotten.

Mary went on to explain that she and I would always be connected by another chance experience. She said her niece Julie got a lifesaving kidney/pancreas transplant last year...at Hopkins...on the same day that Kenny died. She found out later about Kenny and couldn't believe we were there at Hopkins at the very same time...one family mourning the loss of life...one celebrating life anew. The circle of life... I told her it would comfort me on July 28th, to say a prayer in celebration of Julie's one year anniversary. I know Ken would be pleased.

I also ran into another "life traveler" today. A friend who lost her son Ryan years ago in a swimming accident. She and I have felt this very strong bond through our similar, but different experiences. And we literally fell into each others arms outside of Starbucks. She lives about 30 minutes away and we've promised to get together soon over dinner and share our hearts. I've known Kelly since 1991. She is smart and absolutely beautiful and kind. She sent me one of the nicest notes ever when Kenny died. I will cherish it forever!

Life travelers...that's what we are. We feel deeper...we laugh harder...we love stronger...and we lean on each other to get us through.

Never Take Life for Granted

I was on my way home from Lisa's last night and was listening to that radio show with "Delilah." I know, I know, it's a bit on the sappy side. But here's what she said:

Never take life for granted, or people for granted or the people who love you for granted. Live life with Passion...but most of all live it with Kindness!

I agree with Delilah...never...never...take the people who love you for granted!

Here's a You Tube of Eva Cassidy. She is no longer with us...what a loss, what a voice and from what I hear...what a person.

Well Here I Am!!

Here's a photo of my apartment so far! Pretty funny huh?



These others photos are from my balcony to the left and the right. It's quite a view. I'm smack dab in the middle of the City and I love seeing all the people walking, biking and rollerblading through the streets. It's an active community.

This morning I had a cute little bird on my balcony railing. It may have been a female Baltimore Oriole. I've never seen one before but it was a dark rusty orange color on its head and back...with some gray. That's why I think it was probably a female. How cool is that?

I may have to put a bird feeder on my balcony. I'm sure Jazz would like to have some birds to watch.

This morning I was on my way through the lobby looking for a cup of coffee and I ran into a guy from work, Todd. He lives here too and we've known each other for years. So, as it turns out I had someone to join me for coffee and a bagel. Todd says he really likes living here. It's a nice safe area and there's a lot to do. He's got a bike and rides on the Mt. Vernon trail which is right next to our building. I will definitely be getting myself a bike soon and there's a place to lock them up in the basement. How convenient!

I'm here now doing laundry and tidying up the place. Getting things in order. Lisa, Noyan and the girls are on their way here. Lisa is bringing me some things from her antique store inventory...and I can't wait to see what she brings. It's gonna be like opening up a "grab bag." Surprise!! Hopefully by day's end this place will be a bit more functional.

I think I'm really going to like it here. The pool and fitness center are on the second floor. The garbage chute is just down the hall and I keep running into nice people all over this building. There's a community room downstairs so if I get lonely I can head down there to find someone to talk to. And I've already heard about another "crazy cat woman" in the building who spoils her two cats rotten. She even gives them kitty hair cuts in the summer so they won't be hot. And she has some kind of netting thing so she can let them join her out on the balcony. Hm-m-m that sounds like an idea for Jazzy Boy! I'm going to ask the manager downstairs to introduce us. Perhaps we can even arrange kitty cat play days! Jazz says, "I am REALLY going to love it here too! Meow!"

It's Been Nearly a Year...

It's been nearly a year since Kenny died and I find it hard to think about anything else...

I was talking with a new friend of mine tonight. I met Leslie two weeks ago...and she is a widow too. Her husband Bob died six months ago after a two and a half year battle with cancer. As I've learned from talking with Leslie and other widows...our experiences with grieving are much the same.

At six months, things are hitting Leslie harder now than ever before. The same happened with me. A few minutes ago we were sharing some moments and I was reminded of a story I had written one Friday morning, just three weeks after Kenny died.

I pulled the story up from my e-mail archives. I had sent it to friends that morning when I got to work. I just read it again and still think it's amazing. Even now, I can vividly relive the experience. So I decided to post it here on my blog. Leslie has had similar things happen just like this and the same as me, she knows they are not by chance.

Be sure to watch the two music clips at the end, from You Tube. They are the songs I heard on the radio that morning. I can imagine Kenny singing to me the words to that Bob Dylan song. It is as if he wrote it himself.

When you listen to the words of both, you will understand why I cried my way to work that morning.

Subject > 08/24/2007 08:43 AM Wow!

Good Morning dear friends!

I had a sleepless night. Last time I looked at the clock was 4AM...my alarm went off at 5. I got up feeling grim and I prayed for courage, strength and a positive attitude to face this day. I hurried to get ready, jumped into Ken's car to drive to work. Impulsively--- for the first time since he died--- I switched the radio dial. A song was just starting, one of Kenny's favorites, an old Rod Stewart song...Mandolin Wind. I said, "Wow, Ken's song," and smiled, "of course!"

He used to crank it up on the radio and sing it --LOUD and off key!!! Now I know why he loved that song. I had never really listened to the words before...until this morning...and my gosh. I blubbered all the way up Interstate 85.

I finally stopped crying and don't you know the very next song I heard was Bob Dylan's, Forever Young. Same thing, I had never listened to the words before. I started blubbering all over again. I'm sure Ken was guiding me to work this morning. And...I know he will continue to watch over me as I get through this grieving period.

Without really knowing the name of either song, it took me a while to find the lyrics...but here they are... And sorry if this makes you cry. I'm hanging in there as best as I can, one day at a time. Have a great weekend! Lucy

One is the Loneliest Number

One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do...One is the loneliest number even worse than Two...

We Are In Our Apartment! Yeah!!!

Here I am sitting on my apartment floor with my bedpillows as my backrest. I'm using my suitcase as an end table and I'm drinking wine from a water glass! Life is Good! A Josh Groban CD is playing in my portable boombox and I just heated up some leftover steak and asparagus in the microwave...but alas I have no eating utensils. Well...no matter...as they say in my family: "Fingers were made before forks." Today my fingers will work just fine!!

Jazz is right here beside me and I think he has already adjusted. At least he has used his litter box and that's ALWAYS a good sign. I'm guessing he will be a little happier once we have some furniture and so will I. But at least this gives me a chance to look around the little place and decide just what I need. Not much...that's for sure. It's a little bitty apartment! The kitchen is "U" shaped with no room to spare and barely any cabinets. I guess that tells me not to stock up on much. Besides...I'd rather eat out anyway. At least for now.

Thre's plenty of light in this apartment...which I love. And I have a view of Crystal City. Didn't get the airport/Washington side of the building. They were charging quite a premium for those views and I besides I get to see the City every day. But they did install new carpeting and kitchen appliances before I moved in, so that's an added bonus!

I gather I won't actually be in the apartment too many hours of each week. In fact, the week after next, I'll be in Baltimore two nights for our strategic planning offsite. We will be staying in a Hyatt right at the Inner Harbor. I'm pretty psyched about it! The meeting is for our COO, our VPs and senior VPs and will be supported by a limited...very small number of support staff. I'm right in the midst of the planning and have a lot to do next week to get ready. I'm just getting up to speed with all the details and there's a lot of work and coordination to be done. But of course I thrive on the excitement.

My microwave is chirping that my "finger food" is ready. So, I will sign off for now. I may venture out and pick up a few things before it gets too late. I definitely need a shower curtain and a few things like that. And when I get back, I may even take a little cat nap! The fatique is really beginning to set in.

I'm Doing OK

Got my apartment keys last evening and even have a mattress and box springs. They delivered it yesterday. Nothing else yet...no furniture, etc. I keep reminding myself that Rome wasn't built in a day!!!

Last night I had a little help emptying my car. A guy from work stopped by, thankfully! This morning I just finished packing up my hotel room and got one of those carts to move it all with. I'm going to load my car first then come back for my Jazzy Boy! I try to alleviate as much commotion for him as I can, but I can tell he is already a little nervous. By now he has learned what it means when I start packing up suitcases. Poor guy, I'm sure he can't understand why we've left our sweet home behind...

Kyle had offered to come here this morning to help me. But, I hated the thought of him driving all this way to help with just a few things. Especially, when this evening they will be driving all the way to Olney for a party at Marti's. That's just as far...but in the completely opposite direction. I said I could do it myself, but I could tell he was worried about me.

I'm guessing all of this is teaching me patience and perseverance. Two of the characteristics needed most to really enjoy life. I'm getting there...slowly but surely! I sure will be glad when I'm finally settled in.

I Woke Up Crying Today

My stomach is in knots. I can't find my lease agreement. I looked for it last night. Today they are giving me my apartment keys and in exchange I need to initial every page of the lease agreement and give it back to them. I won't get my keys without it. I thought it was in my bag...but no! Maybe it's in my car or on my desk at work...I just have no idea. I can't remember taking it out of my bag.

Last evening my plan for a truck fell through. I was going to run by Costco today after work and buy a mattress. But the friend I had lined up to help tonight can't do it now. Something has come up. At the eleventh hour before leaving work yesterday, I called 1-800 MATTRESS to have one delivered. I selected it from a picture off the Internet. Not the greatest way to pick out a mattress! But work is so hectic right now I don't really have time to focus on some of these details about getting moved into the apartment. And it's crazy living out of a suitcase and a car. Some stuff is in my hotel, the other stuff is in my car and the rest is strewn around with various friends and Ken's Mom. That's what I did to get some of the stuff out of my car and avoid slogging everything into the apartment all at once...on moving day. Luckily I will have some help though. Carla is meeting me here after work today. I'm sure with Carla here it will be fun!!

The mattress store asked me for the address of the building and my apartment number. "I've got the address, but I can't remember the apartment number," I said, "But I'll call you with it when I get back to my hotel." You guessed it...the apartment number is on my lease agreement. Will have to straighten it all out today.

I also just realized I need to give the leasing office a check this afternoon from my other credit union. That checkbook is in my box of important files. It's one of the things I dropped off at Priscilla's this weekend. Good Grief. Today I'll have to think of another solution for that too.

This morning I woke up crying. Last night was my first dream about Kenny since he died nearly a year ago. I dreamed I was getting ready to fly to Dianna's in San Diego. Lisa and I were at the airport. We got downstairs and we couldn't figure out how to get back up. We kept asking people, but no one could tell us. Then I couldn't find my flight ticket...then I realized my wallet was missing. My purse was empty. Sound familiar?

As the rest of the dream goes, I "bagged" my trip to California and Lisa and I went home instead. Then I realized I had been so busy all week that I had forgotten to visit Kenny in the hospital. Oh my Gosh!! I called to talk with him, but a nurse answered. "There is no one in this room," she said. I explained that I was calling for Kenneth...he had been in that room for weeks. She hesitated for a minute, then replied, "Oh, let me check." The nurse put down the phone. I waited and I waited...and waited. But she never returned... I woke up crying.

Tips From George Carlin

It's hard for me to be all choked up about George Carlin's passing. People keep saying, "I can't believe George Carlin died." And not to sound insensitive but, I keep thinking, "That's nothing compared to losing Kenny."

I have to admit, Carlin did have a great sense of humor and that's one thing he and Kenny had in common. From that perspective...I do miss the guy because I believe there is nothing better in the world than someone who can make you laugh!

A friend sent me Carlin's tips for staying young. And actually after reading his tips...well I think we did lose a pretty cool guy. He had it all figured out! I particularly relate to #2. I firmly believe it!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3.Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. An idle mind is the devil's workshop. And the devil's family name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while YOU are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them at every opportunity.

Great Evening

I just got back to my hotel and Jazz really missed me! I had been invited to Gene and Priscilla's for dinner and Pat and Ed joined us from the Eastern Shore (Rehobeth). It was great company and a great dinner...

Crazy enough, I got a little lost on the way home driving through DC. Not sure why...I've driven through the City a million times before. I must not have been paying attention. All of a sudden I realized I had no idea where I was!

"Keep driving a little further and something will look familiar," I thought. And that's exactly what I did. Sure enough, I saw a 295 sign...took it, and ended up on the Douglass Bridge, driving North on South Capitol Street...right past the new Nationals Stadium. "

There in front of me, all lit up against the evening sky was that beautiful Capitol Dome. What a magnificent sight!!
It's the same route I used to take with my carpool each day, passing the old concrete plant on the right and the seedy strip clubs a bit further up. The entire area is now completely transformed. There are new buildings and restaurants all along the way. And the best part? Happy families safely walk the streets where drug traffickers and hookers used to hang out! Years ago, we would shudder to see unknowing tourists on foot in that neighborhood. They had no idea the danger that surrounded them.

From there I got back to the hotel just fine. Piece of cake! And it was good to get in here and lock the door behind me. This is one of my last nights in this location. If all goes as planned I will be in my little apartment in a couple of days. It will be good to get back to some semblance of home and normalcy. I am even looking forward to cozying up the place and making it my own...

Everything's Coming Up Roses

Lately I find myself tripping through the days. Everything is coming up roses and I just can't believe it!! Literally every single day...I have some new amazing moment...a memorable one...with a positive outcome. It's either a new person I meet, or a positive comment someone makes, or something work-wise that allows me to learn something new about myself. How can it be possible? Life is s-o-o-o Good! I hope to never awake from this dream!!!

I Will Not Waste My Life

the world is wide,
and i will not
waste my life in
friction when it
could be turned
into momentum

-frances willard

Amazing Grace

Things are going so well right now...I'm almost afraid to say it for fear I will jinx myself. I don't even know where to start to explain...

A few days ago I was in my office and heard some familiar music from the room next door. I walked over and said, "Hey, you like Eva Cassidy?" My new co-worker Dennis looked shocked and said "Yeah, I play music with her father, Hugh."

Eva is a girl who grew up in Bowie, just like me, but she died a few years ago from a melanoma...a deadly form of skin cancer. People have now discovered her amazingly, beautiful voice. I told Dennis, "I have all her CD's." They continue to digitize her old recordings and release new CD's every so often. A new one is just about ready to hit the stores.

Dennis met Eva's father where they both play music at a church near Annapolis and he told me Hugh is an amazing musician...just like Eva. I suspect, Dennis is too. He explained that Hugh is also an artist...a metal sculptor. "You are kidding me!" I said, "That's what I've been wanting to get into. Planned on doing it in Georgia, but now thought about it here."

This morning Dennis came in and handed me Hugh's phone number. He said this weekend, he had told him about me and Hugh said for me to give him a call. Ironically, Hugh told Dennis he had just been thinking that he needs to pass on what he has learned about metal sculpting to someone else.

I started to cry...I just can't believe the incredible experiences and opportunities that keep falling into my lap these days. I just can't believe it!! I'm going to give him a call. Perhaps I will be his new apprentice.

Today was another day-long meeting of the executive team that I support. I got to know a contractor they had called in to help facilitate their meetings. At first, I was a little concerned that she and I would be like oil and water, because much like me, she has a strong personality. Quite surprisingly...by day's end...we had become fast friends.

As I walked out of the building about 5:30 this evening...I found myself smiling about how the day had wrapped up. No surprise...there on the corner was a street band...and they were playing Amazing Grace.

Another Busy Day

Services at my mother-in-law's church today were sweet. It was good to be in that old historic church again. The last time I was there was for Kenny's memorial service. The stained glass windows are Tiffany! The one in the back of the church features a white dove, just like the one that appeared at the funeral home the night of Ken's visitation. It stayed with us all evening until the very end...awesome. At church today, the first song was...Jesus Loves Me! And well...all I can say is "this I know!!"


Ken's Mom and I took communion together, which was also pretty cool. And of course she "showed me off" to everyone in the church...it was..."This is little Lucy." And instantly they knew who I am...Kenny's wife.

After church we grabbed some brunch and then I was off again. I ran by Carla's to say hi to her Mom and Dad, then headed to Priscilla's and together we went to the bridal shop to meet Jessica and her girlfriends. I found my dress for the wedding and except that it's a bit larger than I wanted to wear...it's perfect! They even had beautiful shoes and a purse to match...and a wispy shaw to cover my bare shoulders. Perfect! The dress will arrive in 6 weeks and there will be plenty of time to get it hemmed and fitted for the October wedding. Of course, I hope when it arrives I will be getting it cut down two sizes smaller than what I ordered. Well hopefully... I can't bear to be this size much longer!!

After ordering our dresses we all stopped for drinks and a few snacks. Ok, maybe the diet will start tomorrow. Jess gave me a birthday present (a little early). She said Kyle had told her, "Mom needs this now, let's go ahead and give it to her." It was pretty flowered dishes and glasses to match from Pottery Barn. Perfect for my new temporary home in Crystal City!

Kenny's Mom had been Jazzy-sitting for me this aftenoon, so I rushed back to her house to get him. I packed up my car, made a couple trips, stuffed Jazz into his carrier and headed back to Virginia to the hotel. He only cried for a few miles then chilled out for the rest of the ride. Perhaps he is getting used to traveling with me. I sure hope so!

It's a Fine Day!

Jazz was sitting in the window when I woke up. He enjoys the birds-eye view of the woods next to Ferne's condo. He is right at home here; he has settled right in and Kenny's Mom is just thrilled with him. Now there are TWO crazy cat women!! She just laughed and said, "You are so right! I am just as MAD as you are!"

In a few minutes I am going to jump in the shower. We are going for Sunday services at Baldwin Memorial United Methodist Church in Crownsville. It's the old stone church where Lisa and Noyan were married and a few years later, Libby and John. It's also where we celebrated Kenny's life...just shy of a year ago.

We plan to go to brunch after church today, then I'm going to swing by Carla's to see her Mom and Dad. It's been a long time since I've seen them.

At 2PM, I'm meeting Jessica to look for bridesmaid dresses. Priscilla is joining us too. I can't wait to see her. She had a rough day Friday, it hit her hard when she thought about Kenny. We were with Gene and Priscilla last year on the 4th. We spent a great day there in spite of the fact that Ken was not feeling well. He had been running a fever. I checked him into the hospital that evening around 11 PM...after spending the day with our friends and family. I'm glad I insisted (against Doctor's orders) on giving him that last day of fun. We have some great memories...

It's Great to be Home!

Yesterday was fabulous! I was with my family again!
We had a good time at Lisa's.



Lots of laughing, margueritas...oh yeah...and food, food, food!



It was Pop's birthday and we celebrated in style. Lisa found a big American flag from 1905...it has only 46 stars. Very cool! She hung it on the side of her house. It should probably be in a museum somewhere, but she thought it was a perfect way to pay tribute to our Dad.

Later in the day, Jessica asked Pop to walk her down the aisle for her and Kyle's wedding in October. Right away he said, "I would be honored!" How sweet is that? I even got a little choked up about it. It's nice that Jessica loves my family so much!! She has made us her own. It's clear that she loves us...and we LOVE her too! And of course our Chloe is the added bonus!! BINGO!


Lisa's friend Pat was there with her family and Ericka and Graham and family were here from Scotland. Noyan's parents were also there.

My mother-in-law was there to celebrate with us too. Libby had picked her up for me on the way over from the Eastern Shore. She went home with me last evening to stay at my hotel in Virginia. I tried hard not to dwell on last year. Kenny's last Holiday...

The Longest Day
No wonder I'm so tired as I'm writing this blog. It has been a l-o-n-g, busy week and today I packed in about as much more excitement as I could.

This morning Kenny's Mom and I got up early for a Saturday...6AM! We got showered, dressed and ambled downstairs to breakfast. Then we packed up our stuff, including Jazz, for the trip to Annapolis where she lives. On our way, I stopped at Headquarters to drop of my books and work folders and supplies I had brought with me from the South.

Ken's Mom and Jazz waited in the car while I slogged everything upstairs to my office. Before I got back to the car with the push cart, it started pouring...and I got drenched trying to drag everything out of the car. Some of the bags were wedged in between the seats and I had quite a time getting them out. What an ordeal! My hair got wet, my shirt got wet! Boy oh boy! We laughed at the craziness of it!

I hope I don't have to do this kind of thing too many more times...moving and all. My car is still filled to the brim. I look like the Beverly Hillbillies with all the stuff I keep hauling around, including Shrek and Pink Poodle! Hopefully I'll be moving into an Apartment on Friday and I'll be able to get settled and stop living out of bags and boxes!! But...I'm really not complaining...It's GREAT to be home!!

Ferne's neighbor lady Bobbie stopped by. Her husband died 6 months ago and she is still having a very difficult time. We talked a bit about what it's like, and I'm still amazed at just how similar the "widowed" experience really is. She and I shared some of the exact same feelings. And sure enough, Bobbie went a few weeks ago and got herself a cat. It has made a world of difference for her to have something to think about...other than her sorrow. She loves her Bubba just as much as I love my Jazzy Boy!

This afternoon my friend Carla picked me up and we headed to a party at the home of two old highschool pals. We sat outside and ate more great food. Good times...good times. Could you pinch me now?

I got home a little while ago and Jazz ran to greet me. Ken's Mom just loves him and he seems pretty content here. He is getting to be such a traveler! And that's a good thing because I intend to take that cat everywhere I go from now on. He's my Jazzy Boy!

Happy 4th of July Birthday Pop!

My Pop is seventy-five today!! Yep! He was born on the Fourth of July. No wonder I'm so patriotic!! I got it from my Dad.

We were the only house on the block with the full regulation flag pole out front. My brother and I used to go out together and hoist that flag in the morning...and at sunset we would bring it down. We were ever so careful not to let it touch the ground!! That's what Pop taught us. I'll bet we could still do that old triangle fold in a matter of minutes because we've had years of practice!

Today will be a big celebration at Lisa's house. And I'm sure glad to be home for it. Didn't think I'd get to go home this year...little did I know...I'd already be here! Libby is going to stop on her way and pick up Kenny's Mom. Kyle, Jessica and Chloe are coming after Jess gets home from work. I haven't seen them yet since I've arrived and I can't wait to get my arms around them!! Mom and Dad are bringing my Grandmother too. Even Noyan's Mom and Dad will be there and Lisa's friends Ericka and Graham from Scotland. We'll have lots of good food, lots of good company...and of course fire works at night.

With any luck, Pop will get the kids cranking some home-made ice cream. It's a treat they always enjoy...and eating it too of course!


Happy Birthday Pop!

I'll bet this photo takes you back a few years!

Love you bunches, Cissy

What a Day!

Things are so busy now...but I'm happy and I can't stop smiling!! I keep running into people at work that I know...and they practically jump up and down when they see me. I still can't get over it! I'm not sure when I've gotten such a warm reception.

This picture is from a few nights ago when Susan, her friend Joey and I went to dinner on Capitol Hill. As you can see we sat at a sidewalk cafe. And don't we look alike?

Today I hurried through the day. Didn't stop for lunch. In between working on my projects, I also made some calls about apartments and went to look at one. It's less expensive than the first apartment I had considered and it's also in a good location, right across from the Crystal City Shops, the Metro and the Post Office. I stopped at the Post Office and got a P.O. Box. That seemed wiser than having the mail go to the apartment. And it will be convenient to stop and pick it up on my way home. Also, if I should have to go on travel, I can just let them know and they will hold it 'till I get back.

After looking at the apartment and filling out the lease application I jumped on the Metro again and went one stop to my hotel. It had been a sweltering, sticky day in DC, so I jumped in the shower again, changed my clothes and headed right back out again. I got in the car and drove back to the Headquarters Building so I could park there.

A group of people from work planned to meet on the mall for the 4th of July practice. As I walked along, it dawned on me I hadn't eaten all day, so I stopped at the local work "hang-out" Vie de France.

Thursday nights they have a D.J. and free food, so I bought a beer, grabbed some food, listened to a few MoTown songs and chatted with some work friends. With a sizeable tip, my bill came to all of $5. Yeah, I know...big spender!!

Next I walked the few blocks to the celebration to join my new co-workers. They had reserved a nice spot by spreading out blankets on the Capitol lawn right in front of the stage. It was GREAT! We be-bopped to Huey Lewis and the News and then Jerry Lee Lewis. They were both just as good (and good looking!) as ever and it was a fun way to get the weekend started. After the show we all walked back to the building and I jumped in my car and was home in 15 minutes. Neat!

Starting My Day With a Song...

Smile though your heart is aching,
Smile even though it's breaking,
When there are clouds in the sky,
You'll get by...

Smile through your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow,
You'll see the sun come shining through,
For you...

When you light up your face with gladness,
Hide every trace of sadness,
Although a tear may be ever so near

That's the time you must keep on trying,
Smile what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just SMILE...

Keeping Busy!!!

Yesterday...things really cranked up. Someone on the team asked me to help her get a contract awarded...so that's back breaking stuff to get done pretty quickly. And at the end of the day, I was asked by the boss to work on a "short fuse" assignment for the big Summit that's coming up in August. It's another one of those projects that someone else had been working on... You know what that means!!!

Same thing happened back in January. He called me to Washington and gave me a project that had been in the works for over six months. I had only two weeks to take it over and pull it off. I'm guessing this will be a similar experience. Too much left to do in too little time!!! And that's all while working the original job I was asked here to do. So, I'll be Busy, busy, busy from now on. That's how it's looking. And...crazy enough I thrive on that kind of thing and on being in the midst of "the happening." So I'm still loving it!

Oh...and I still have to find myself a permanent apartment. Still have the car packed full of stuff. Maybe sometime this weekend I can squeeze an apartment search into my schedule!! Got to!